- Terry BallantyneThe Change of LifeMay 23, 2017I always thought this was about a woman’s period! You know, the passage from maidenhood to mavenhood. The dreaded transition from youth to a life of a bored and sexless routine. Gray days of wrinkles and regrets. Well, guess again! The real “Change” is happening to couples and singles who realize they are getting olderl and need to create a homelife that will work for them into their 90s. And if their health is not an issue, they want freedom from earthly ties and...
- Terry BallantynePlanning AheadMay 1, 2017PLANNING AHEAD Looking ahead to our “golden years” is nobody’s idea of a great conversation starter. If you are under 40 you may be inclined to stop reading here, but DON”T. Likely you have parents, aunts, older cousins and they need your wisdom about thinking ahead, and as surely as the sun rises in the east, you are aging. (Shocking, I know.) I am finally hearing conversations at open houses about folks who are spry and active in their mid-60s saying “I Know,” with...
- Terry BallantyneWhat is aging?February 27, 2016When I observe our most elder people in the community, it is easy to assume they are sort of little shells of a life lived long ago. I see them shuffle or amble slowly at the market, sometimes shaky limbs reaching for the milk, or a hesitant hand pick over a bin of tomatoes. They seem hollow, as if getting to the market and home is about all they can manage. I often wonder what keeps them going? Looking from the outside it seems impossible...
- Terry BallantyneDirty Little SecretsDecember 7, 2015Our culture tends to romanticize things or speak in euphemisms about the hard stuff. Nobody tells new mothers just how challenging the 24 hour presence of a newborn is. It would sound ungrateful. We soldiered on in relative silence, and unless you have the luxury and the joy of a family nearby that consists of supportive women: loving and wise aunts, grandparents and a trusted mother, it is a daunting stretch those first months and then really the first years. Spreading the responsibility helps both...
- Terry BallantyneThe Dog FriendsJuly 26, 2015The Dog Friends One never knows what the group you call family will consist of. We are all so far flung from our natural extended family that in a crisis they could not do much for us. With a distance of 100 miles away or more , they can’t wrap there arms around you, make a pot of tea, call the doctor, or hold your hand. For those very important and immediate comforts ,you need trusted friends next door, around the block or a quick car...
- Terry BallantyneThe ButteryJune 8, 2015I took my Mom out for lunch today. I watched her marvel at the hub bub and pace at The Buttery and I can’t help but reflect on the world now and the world she grew up in. She once rode 2 miles to town on a cardboard box, like a skim board being pulled by two draft horses on a set of reins. She was a daredevil. And here she sat, almost terrified at the pace, but fascinated at the women with tats, the...
- Terry BallantyneMind Your EldersApril 20, 2015I’m getting some pushback about the term Olderhood. “Why not Elderhood” “Why or Seniorhood” I am asked. “I don’t want to be old.” they tell me. I called it Olderhood because everyone is older than someone. First graders hold sway over kindergarden kids. High school kids disdain the junior high group. Seniors are the elders to the Freshman class. As we move through life we are getting older, and this column is not directed solely at the 80+ crowd. There are things of interest hopefully...